I love birds. There! I’ve said it. Now you know.
Bird watching is like wearing black. At first, you just have a couple of items that interest you, but soon it’s your whole world. Sometime about ten years ago, I realized that every spring I would hear birds singing but I couldn’t tell one from another. I also realize there was a large category of birds I called “sparrows” which included anything not robin, jay, crow, or pigeon. So, I decided to learn a bit more, so as to be able to be more in touch with my surroundings.
And then I thought I’d learn a little more. And a little more. And… oh god! The birdies! I must look at them ALL THE TIME!
So, it’s no surprise when we actually bought a condo a few months ago, I but up a couple of bird feeders — nectar and seed. And I waited for the birds to come outside my window so I could obsess about them in close range. The birds had other thoughts. They thought they’d taunt me by *not* coming to our feeders for months. I’d watch the full feeders, swaying in the breeze, and rue the day I let the passerines get the upper hand in my life. (note: I could have said “upper claw,” but I refrained).
After eight weeks of no activity at our new bird feeders, a very small female hummingbird 
showed up, which my partner K cleverly named Esmerelda. We became very attached to “Essie”, and despite her diminutive size, she reigned supreme for a short time, chasing away and intruders. Eventually, she let a male hummingbird enjoy the feeder too, and we named him “Eddie.”
Since then, there’s been a new face every few weeks. Next, a very large female, “Ester,” showed up and took over completely. We barely see Essie anymore. But, for a while, these three were our main visitors.
A week ago “Earl”, a much brighter male, appeared, and today we noticed a new female — larger than Essie but smaller than Ester, who we called “Emma”.
Here’s the silly psychological phenomenon that’s gone along with this bit of birdie drama. In my mind, these birds have become “our” birds, and since they are ours, they are somehow “superior” to other hummingbirds I see. The concept of possession and ownership has forced itself on free, wild animals who don’t give a whit about me. How does this happen? I decided to do some research.
My first stop has been Erich Fromm’s To Have or To Be? which I’ll write more about in my next post.
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[…] in my post about bird obsession and possession, I can see I obviously fell into this mindset. It was my impulse to think of the hummingbirds as […]